Assignments?

Slacking @ Yak’s, Part 2

I would rather that the conversation had remained on partying, or beer, or dicks or whatever. But after Dee got a beer, the conversation remained focused back on Dr. Marty, “Life Coach.”

“He gave us assignments!” Dee said with too much joy.

I added, “Yeah. Three. I feel like I’m in college. These sessions with Dr. Marty - I want to drop them as quick as sophomore French.”

Dee said, “I think his stuff’s cool.”

Dee can speak in such a genuine manner that I didn’t contradict her. She actually makes the word “cool” seem “cool” - something that is very hard to do. If I tried to use the word “cool,” I’d sound like I was selling a car.

“So what kind of assignments?” C asked.

I didn’t give Dee a chance to offer up an elaborate explanation. “The first was to get a comedy album to laugh more. Laughing meditation he called it.”

I had my new Steven Wright album for that.

Dee said, “The second was to buy - but don’t read - the book Getting Things Done. Someone in my office swears by David Allen. Anything to help me be organized is probably great, and Marty had such a great way to describe the importance of this.”

Dee loved telling stories, transforming simple answers into epic tales of adventure.

Cutting her short, I said, “Yeah, he said, ‘productivity requires some new reality thinking’. Productivity is as old as dirt and reality is older.”

Duke laughed. Dee said, “Tom.”

“It’s just bullshit,” I said. “And then get this, the third one. I hate this one. I have to think about who I talk to when I talk to myself. I’m supposed to imagine this person as a real person. He’s an asshole. We’re supposed to have imaginary friends. He’s a crackpot.”

“Tom’s a dick,” Dee said. “Actually, he’s a chicken so he doesn’t have a dick.”

Duke laughed. I said, “He’s a nut.”

“Marty is smart,” Dee said. “He talks about using your brain as a tool, and just some unique ways to get unstuck and master problems. So it was both really cool and practical.”

“Can I use my tool as a brain?” Duke asked.

C answered, “You always do.”

…continued

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Slacking @ Yak’s

Part 2: Assignments?
Part 1: Yakking The Porno Mustache